So I am stopping sugar as of today. I am feeling the withdrawals as I write this post with quivering fingers.
Scott and I decided to make a bet: I would stop sugar cold turkey while he would stop diet soda. I am allowed my few teaspoons of sugar in the morning with my coffee and he is allowed one regular soda a day just so we don't go completely insane.
I have contemplated giving up sugar multiple times. Everyone always asks why or likes to state that I shouldn't deprive myself. I don't think people understand how addicted to sugar I am. And when I say addicted I mean addicted.
Some people are addicted to cigarettes, some drugs. I am addicted to sugar. Of course I temper it with a food snob's sensibilities. I can't have any old sugar. It needs to be good, respectable forms of sugar. Take for instance home made chocolate chip cookies none of this chips ahoy crap! I want quality which by the way is probably the only reason I am not 400 lbs...I need quality sugar. And in case you are wondering, no I am not morbidly obese. I am overweight but I stay active. I don't take a bag of oreo's to my closet and have an eating contest of one.
Anyway. I have thought for a very long time that my dependence on sugar was holding me back. Its that one thing that I can't seem to overcome. Its now become this challenge. Mind over matter.
Well when you also get down and dirty when it comes to what sugar is and how it can affect your body it isn't the best "food" to be consuming. I also have to ask if its inline with my food philosophy. I am trying really hard to eat food in its most natural forms and do I want to ruin that with sugar?
I am under no illusions here. I will eat sugar again and that I know to be the truth. I am hoping to make it sugar free (well the most obvious forms of it at least! I am not going to read labels like crazy)to October. I want my wonderful birthday cake to be the first taste of sugar...so October 23 here I come....wish me luck.
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Sunday, August 8, 2010
I am a Reader
I am a reader. Its the single most defining sentence to me. Reading, writing, books, stories is the essence of who I am, other than maybe loving animals. I remember the days when I was first learning to read. I was so frustrated because I could identify some words but not others and the inability to understand it all knowing there was something behind all those words was killing me. And then one day I could read...just like that.
I read everything I could get my hands on. I loved summers because then I could read without the distractions of math or science or any of the other silly subjects in school. The local libraries would have summer reading programs for the kids...always a map tracking the books you read and getting prizes at different milestones. I would always scream through the maps finishing before a quarter of summer was even up. The late summer nights with the cool wet feel of the swamp cooler running and my single light in my blue bedroom. I would laugh and cry with all the characters living hundreds of lives in just a few months. I miss those days so very much.
I had fantasies of living in a library (and if I hadn't gotten married at the Grand Canyon; a library would have been a very good second choice!). I dream often of being surrounded by books...all that potential just waiting to be let loose. I so desperately want to design a house that has bookshelves in every room, including bathrooms and kitchens! It would be an odd place for sure, but so very comforting to me. For now I suffice with three six foot book cases, although I need more.
I am not a person who collects things. I never quite understood the purpose of collecting objects, especially if for no real purpose. I tried with Breyer horses for a while, but by adulthood I got sick of packing them up each time I moved. Ah but my books are of another matter. So far 8 heavy boxes the last time we moved. And yet I acquire more. I can't stop. Its more than just having them...its stories and ideas all at my finger tips waiting to expose themselves to me at the moment I need them most.
Books are a need to me like food or water. I am convinced that my brain would shrivel up and die if I couldn't read books. The act of reading expands my mind exponentially and its a better high than any man made drug could ever conjure. Ah so maybe it truly is more than a need, its an addiction. An addiction that should never have a treatment to cure.
And yet here I am today wanting to read and not finding anything that is inspiring me at the moment. There is nothing worse than rummaging through my stacks and finding all sorts of books I still haven't read and yet not being inclined to read them. I was sitting there thinking I need a book that will speak to my soul. Ha! Like that book is just sitting there with a neon sign attached stating: "Life Changing Book Here" with an arrow attached. No such luck.
And so instead of reading I write. If not to be inspired by someone else's story I tell my own hoping it will inspire someone else.
I read everything I could get my hands on. I loved summers because then I could read without the distractions of math or science or any of the other silly subjects in school. The local libraries would have summer reading programs for the kids...always a map tracking the books you read and getting prizes at different milestones. I would always scream through the maps finishing before a quarter of summer was even up. The late summer nights with the cool wet feel of the swamp cooler running and my single light in my blue bedroom. I would laugh and cry with all the characters living hundreds of lives in just a few months. I miss those days so very much.
I had fantasies of living in a library (and if I hadn't gotten married at the Grand Canyon; a library would have been a very good second choice!). I dream often of being surrounded by books...all that potential just waiting to be let loose. I so desperately want to design a house that has bookshelves in every room, including bathrooms and kitchens! It would be an odd place for sure, but so very comforting to me. For now I suffice with three six foot book cases, although I need more.
I am not a person who collects things. I never quite understood the purpose of collecting objects, especially if for no real purpose. I tried with Breyer horses for a while, but by adulthood I got sick of packing them up each time I moved. Ah but my books are of another matter. So far 8 heavy boxes the last time we moved. And yet I acquire more. I can't stop. Its more than just having them...its stories and ideas all at my finger tips waiting to expose themselves to me at the moment I need them most.
Books are a need to me like food or water. I am convinced that my brain would shrivel up and die if I couldn't read books. The act of reading expands my mind exponentially and its a better high than any man made drug could ever conjure. Ah so maybe it truly is more than a need, its an addiction. An addiction that should never have a treatment to cure.
And yet here I am today wanting to read and not finding anything that is inspiring me at the moment. There is nothing worse than rummaging through my stacks and finding all sorts of books I still haven't read and yet not being inclined to read them. I was sitting there thinking I need a book that will speak to my soul. Ha! Like that book is just sitting there with a neon sign attached stating: "Life Changing Book Here" with an arrow attached. No such luck.
And so instead of reading I write. If not to be inspired by someone else's story I tell my own hoping it will inspire someone else.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
The Simple Things...
Do you ever think you get away from the important things in life? Do you forget to savor the little things? I am a person that prides myself on being able to remember to savor life, but lately with all that's going on I have forgotten.
I am slowly trying to remember again and here are a few of my highlights:
1-Riding my bike in the early morning with the sun just starting to peak and the air crisp. The cold breeze stinging my skin just the slightest while the chilly air rushes into my lungs. I feel so alive and I just want that moment to last forever.
2-The days when Weiser (my African Grey parrot) makes little kissing noises at me and gives me this look of wonder and excitement for just seeing my face. He seems to relax when I smile at him and to know you give that much comfort to another creature on this planet well your heart swells.
3-The day you stop and smell the coffee in your cup...usually I guzzle it down so my day can get started as soon as possible. If you just sit and look out the window enjoy the morning sun and smell the strong aroma of the coffee. You take that first sip and it's hot but the flavor melts on your tongue. Somehow sipping coffee always makes me feel like all is right in the world.
I have read in many places that you should write down the things you are thankful for and in doing so you gain a different perspective. You are able to find and maintain balance. It really is the simple things in life....
I am slowly trying to remember again and here are a few of my highlights:
1-Riding my bike in the early morning with the sun just starting to peak and the air crisp. The cold breeze stinging my skin just the slightest while the chilly air rushes into my lungs. I feel so alive and I just want that moment to last forever.
2-The days when Weiser (my African Grey parrot) makes little kissing noises at me and gives me this look of wonder and excitement for just seeing my face. He seems to relax when I smile at him and to know you give that much comfort to another creature on this planet well your heart swells.
3-The day you stop and smell the coffee in your cup...usually I guzzle it down so my day can get started as soon as possible. If you just sit and look out the window enjoy the morning sun and smell the strong aroma of the coffee. You take that first sip and it's hot but the flavor melts on your tongue. Somehow sipping coffee always makes me feel like all is right in the world.
I have read in many places that you should write down the things you are thankful for and in doing so you gain a different perspective. You are able to find and maintain balance. It really is the simple things in life....
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